


Chapter 6 : IN THE RIGHT PLACE

by Myril_Chan



Series: BEFORE DAO [6]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, Grey Warden Joining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:20:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26697385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Myril_Chan/pseuds/Myril_Chan
Summary: Wolves, golden halla & Alistair's joining.Please consider have a look on RagamuffinRose stunning illustration of Alistair waiting for his destiny to trigger here : https://www.deviantart.com/ragamuffinrose/art/Alistair-Knight-Templar-180108434 (pretty muscles bonus)The idea behind my Before:DAO series is to tell my Mahariel and Alistair's parallel childhoods. I took inspiration from the real lore to make it as realistic and lore-friendly as possible. All my inspirations and sources are mentionned in the end.This serie is part of my whole fanfic which aims to tell the story of Alistair & warden from their childhood to DAI and maybe further...Comment & (constructive) critics are highly welcome to help me improve my writting.If you have a fanfic on the same themes : please let me know !
Relationships: Alistair/Female Mahariel (Dragon Age), Alistair/Female Warden (Dragon Age)
Series: BEFORE DAO [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1942735





	1. Ymlaïs'part

**9:30 DRAGON - 6 months before the battle of Ostagar**

Thinking about it, to go on such a hunt through the woods was _really_ a stupid idea. But she had not _really_ thought when two days earlier, she had seen the beast. And now Ymlaïs was lost, exhausted, hungry... And empty-handed.

Two days earlier, it was the big moment: the departure for his first hunt. The one that would make her a full-fledged hunter of the clan. She had carefully prepared her bow, her arrows, her dagger, her healing equipment, an axe if necessary, and had sunk into the forest with a fierce will.

She had first crossed the tracks of some minor games: rabbits, poultries. But it was out of question to bring this small fry back to the clan ! No, she wanted to shine !

It was then that in the heart of a clearing, she had seen it. A halla like she had never seen before: an immaculate white fur and, laid on the top of its skull, two golden antlers. _Hanal'ghilan_ , the legendary halla. Subjugated, she had advanced. She wanted to see it up close, touch it, talk to it. She had done it so many times with the hallas of the clan. But the animal ran away at her approach and at that moment she forgot everything else: the hunt... and caution.

For two days she had been wandering the woods, losing the trail, finding it, seeing the animal before it disappeared again. After two intense days of little sleep, feeding on a few berries and quenching her thirst in the few streams she found on her way, her body reached its limits.

Where was she? She had no idea. She had simply followed the halla without looking for direction.She couldn't explain why, but the place seemed to be unhealthy, abnormal,... Vicious.Anyway, it was well worth it to have chased rainbows only to return to the camp empty-handed after two days of hunting ! What a skilled hunter she was indeed ! Perhaps if she took a little rest, she might at least have the strength to bring back a minor game; for not having done all this in vain.

She let her sore and broken up body slide down a tree trunk. That is when she saw them. Three wolves came out of the thickets and roared fiercely. Wolves usually avoided hunters, even when they were more numerous. Only one thing could push them to overcome their natural fear for two-legged people : hunger. What a fool she was not to have spotted them before ! She was trapped like a rabbit ! 

Slowly she began to reach her bow and notch an arrow, but the first wolf, black and massive, charged towards her. Within a few seconds, she had draw her bow and targeted roughly. She reached the wolf in full chest as it was jumping on her and it fell heavily upon her. With the energy of despair, she freed herself from the body and in the same mouvement, seized her dagger and planted it in the animal's heart to finish it.

But the other two wolves had already approached. Using her bow what out of question now. Seizing her axe with the other hand, she was about to sell her life dearly. One of the wolves with the brownish fur, the leanest, groaned and showed fangs but remained in retreat: probably cooled by the death of its companion. But the other, grey and tall, attacked. Ymlaïs dodged the charge in a leap at the last moment and managed to stick her axe in the side of the animal. But her forces betraying her, she had a fatal dizziness that weakened her blow and gave the animal, which was now mad with pain, time to spring back. It threw her to the ground and Ymlaïs could only prevent the wolf from grabbing her by the throat by putting the handle of her axe across its mouth. Instinctevily, the wolf grabbed it to not let go and as if enraged, undertook to plough her face with its claws. Protecting herself with an arm Ymlaïs felt the cuts that the claws were able to dig despite her sturdy leather armbands. Blood flowed into her eyes. She was out of strength, disarmed and there were two of them. When the other wolf would join the fight, that would be the end.

Suddenly the grey wolf was miraculously thrown into the air to hit the trunk of the tree in a yap of pain. _Hanal'ghilan_. Charging with all its strength, the halla had repelled the wolf with its antlers in a masterful blow. It had come back - to save her life? - before returning to the thicket. Was it a dream? Nevermind. It was no time to be subjugated again. The grey wolf put out of action, she recovered her weapons and turned her attention to her last opponent. The animal retreated moaning but without daring to leave.

Ymlaïs kept it closely on sight and the two adversaries watched one another for a moment. As the wolf didn't seem to be willing to attack, Ymlaïs slowly lowered her weapons and crouched down.

" _Atisha, Falon. Atishan. Ar'din nuvenin na'din_ *****. I just want to stay alive, just like you. So go back to where you came from and I’ll do the same."

As if it had understood, the wolf retreated again, seemed to hesitate, looked at the hunter, then looked back. Ymlaïs uttered a desperate shout : "Go away!" and the animal fled, as well as a flock of birds. Only the grey wolf's agonizing gasps could be heard. Ymlaïs approached. The animal lay on its side. The halla's antlers had disemboweled it and blood flowed from its nose and flank. It was dying and its suffering was visible. " _Abelas_ **". Laying her hand gently on the bloody fur, the young woman took her dagger. The wolf closed his eyes, its breathing became calmer. She planted her knife in the heart of the beast.

" _Falon’Din enasal enaste_ ***".

Out of strength, she let herself fall against the tree again. Shaking, she began to heal her wounds with a poultice before bandaging them. She also drank an elfroot brew : terribly bitter, but pretty effecient. She already felt better. Her gaze landed on the two wolves corpses lying beside her. At least she had two worthy trophies to bring back to the clan now. She began to chop up the first wolf and cut up a piece of bloody flesh which she devoured with full teeth. This gave her strength and calmed her hunger.

A noise in the thickets caught her attention. She paused, her senses in alert, before announcing: "You can show yourself, I know you’re here". Two yellow eyes looked at her through the brush. "You never let go don’t you?". Ymlais noticed that the wolf was especially interested in the meat she was holding. Cutting another piece, she threw it directly into the bushes. "It’s your companion, but... I guess it doesn't make any difference anymore, right?". The wolf advanced with extreme slowness, exposing itself as few as possible outside its hideout. When its muzzle was within range of the meat, he seized it and set out from whence it had come. "You're welcome". Ymlaïs undertook to finish her work but, before she could take care of the second corpse, the wolf had come back. Again she gave it a piece of meat and the same scene repeated. And again. And again. What did that mean ? Decided to find out, Ymlais followed the path of the beast. After a short walk, she arrived in front of a small cave whose entrance was hidden by the roots of an huge tree. The wolf entered but, feeling that it had been followed, came out growling. Suddenly, small yappings were heard and a tiny wolf ventured to the entrance of the cave. Then a second.

So that was it ? The wolf was a female and she brought back the meat to feed her babies. Only two... Usually the wolf litters were more numerous. And where was the rest of the pack? The others might have starve to death...or something else. That explained why the survivors had attacked. Ymlaïs was glad she had spared the she-wolf, two other lives would have followed her in death if she had killed her.

She retraced her path and finished preparing her package for the way home. Then she brought the skinned corpses to the den. Climbing to the top of trees, she found her way home and the next day, she was back in the camp.

The welcome was euphoric. Not only was the clan relieved and happy to see her alive after three days without news, but the young hunter was bringing back not one but two first-rate trophies! Somewhat embarrassed, Ymlais asked to speak to the Elders and explained that she had not really accomplished her task alone. In regard of the salutary help she had received from the halla she was persuaded that they would consider that she had not proved her worth. She was surprised to hear that in their view, not only had she shown the bravery and skill expected of a hunter, but that she had also honoured the Vir Talanadh. Haren Païvel affirmed that he would tell her hunt to the generations to come because the three wolves symbolized the wise choices one can make when it comes to take a life : a life taken out of necessity to ensure survival, a life taken out of compassion, to appease suffering and a life spared because there is no need to kill what does not harm us. The keeper declared that the presence of Hanal'ghilan was proof that Ghilan'nain had blessed this hunt. In honor of this blessing, a few days later, when her head wounds allowed it, the young elf’s face was proudly adorned with a tattoo depicting two halla's antlers - symbols of the Goddess -, painting with a rare golden brown ink.

* "Peace my friend. Peace. I don't want to kill you."

** "Sorry " 

*** A prayer for the dead, that I would roughly translate by "May Falon'Din grant you His favors and welcome you with joy".

\----


	2. Alistair's part

As Alistair descended the steps leading to the Joining's room, he felt like every step was bringing him closer to his destiny. After about ten days spent amongst the Grey Wardens since his recruitment, he was finally going to become a full member of the order. Sometimes he still had a hard time realizing. Just a few weeks ago, he still imagined that he would spend his life in a circle of magi in the depths of the Anderfels, divided between prayer and monitoring the mages, wondering at each Harrowing whether he would have to pass innocent people by the edge of his sword. And now he was serving a cause in which he truly believed and which would claim for only blood that of the darkspawns.

All this thanks to Duncan. The man who had changed his destiny against all expectations: his own and apparently those of many others. Alistair still could not believe that Duncan had invoked the right of conscription to recruit him and no other worthier warrior. The other Grey Wardens present at the Chantry tournament seemed to have asked themselves the same question. Upon his arrival, the rumor that the commander had recruited a kid instead of three seasoned veterans had quickly gone around and Alistair had been greeted with some septic pouts. But Duncan had never seemed to doubt his choice or Alistair’s ability to become the recruit the Wardens needed. It had helped him greatly. For the first time in his life, someone seemed to have faith in him. For the first time in his life, someone had chosen him for what he was and not rejected him for what he was not. This gave Alistair wings : the will to deserve the chance that had been so dearly offered to him and to prove that he had a rightfull place among the Wardens.

He would remember all his life the fear he had felt when he encounter his first darkspawn. Nothing had prepared him for the horror that had inspired him this creature of humanoid appearance but so corrupted that it exuded evil and inspired only disgust. He had been afraid but had not failed. At the thought of disappointing Duncan, he had swallowed his intense desire to run away and bravely stood up to the threat. He himself had brought down the darkspawn from which it collected the blood, sinking his sword to the hilt in its breast with a fury proportional to the horror which the creature had inspired him. He had returned to the Order with his precious vial and an increased motivation. If being a Grey Warden meant preserving the world from such a scourge, then he had found his way. The pouts had given way to friendly smiles and the comments had stopped in his path. The kid had guts. Duncan had a happy smile when he returned alive, victorious and full of fierce resolution.

Besides, any help seemed good to take. It was whispered that the darkspawns had massively gathered in the south of Ferelden and that they were ascending from the outer reach of the Korcari wilds. Some veterans were whispering the word “Blight” and under the comradeship, the atmosphere was getting more and more tense. A delegation from Orlaïs had even come to witness the situation. If it became worse, the help of the Orlesian Wardens would prove necessary. Despite Duncan’s efforts in this regard, years of banishment had not allowed the Fereldan Grey Wardens to increase their rank sufficiently to face an invasion of darkspawns, let alone a Blight. One of the delegates, a calm man named Riordan who did not have an Orlesian accent, came to attend the Joining. At his side was Brandwayn, a mage from Jainen circle who had joined the Wardens three months earlier and had been the new recruits’ guide in their quest for the darkspawn blood.

At the thought of the Joining, Alistair brought his mind back to the present. He was at the dawn of a new life. _His_ life. And no one would be able to contest his place anymore. No possible turning back.

Duncan entered the room holding a large silver chalice. He embraced the room with his gaze, pausing on each person and instinctively, all adopted a concentrated or collected attitude.

"The Joining can begin. Brandwayn, would you like to say the words of the first of us?"

The young Grey Warden nodded and recited.

“ _Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that can not be forsworn. And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day we shall join you._ ”

Duncan first turned to the other new recruit, Colban : a huge fellow from an Avvar clan who wore tanned animal skins and painted his face with frightening patterns. Alistair had often wondered how Duncan had recruited him, but never why he had. The boy was a force of nature and seemed to devote his life to being worthy of his guardian god: Hakkon, whose name he often spoke. He was a recruit of choice against the darkspawns.

"For this moment forth Colban, you are a Grey Warden."  
  
Colban looked at the bottom of the cup and sniffed its contents.  
  
"Wait, that’s why the blood vials? You mean we’re going to _drink_ the blood of these monsters? _That_ ’s the Joining ?"

Ducan replied in a calm voice : "Indeed. Darkspawn blood connects us to them, protects us from the corruption of the Blight and gives us the power to slay the Archdemon. Here lies the strength of the Grey Wardens.” The avvar looked around him as if he expected everyone to burst out laughing and told him it was a joke. But no one laughed. Shaking his head with a dubious look and shrugging his shoulders, he carried the chalice to his lips and drank. Duncan had just enough time to catch up with it when Colban almost immediately dropped the receptacle to carry his hands to his throat. Falling down on his knees, he uttered an atrocious howl, as if the flames of hell consumed him from within. Anyway, the spasms that shook his body seemed to suggest that it was so. One of these spasms folded him in half and he violently vomited blood before collapsing with a death rattle. His eyes turned back and he did not move. Stone dead.

A deafening silence invaded the room, but Alistair could still hear echoes of the howls of his unfortunate companion. That is why the Union ceremony was kept secret. Raised in a castle, Alistair had expected a kind of knighting in which darkspawn blood would occupy a symbolic function ; certainly not that. This is what might await him in reality: a painful death without glory. If a force of nature like Colban had succumbed, how could _he_ survive?

The commander of the guard had bent down to close the eyelids of the deceased man and murmured with a voice full of sincere regret : « I am sorry Colban». For a moment, he was the embodiment of human compassion. But when he rose up and approached Alistair to hand him the chalice, his gaze was firm and penetrating. He looked Alistair straight in the eyes as if to close any loophole. "Do it," he seemed to say.

Alistair felt like being asked to throw himself off a cliff. He could feel the others' gazes on him. In Riordan's eyes, the sad resignation of the one who had seen many other moments like this. In Brandwayn’s eyes, the empathy of a person for whom the memory of the ordeal was still vivid. Every of them had gone throught this trial, every of them had survived. And anyway, was there anything else in his life worth giving up now ? No. If he had to end it, he would only leave a life that was empty of meaning and full of rejection. His place was here, or nowhere else.

" For this moment forth Alistair, you are a grey warden."

He took the chalice and drank. He made an effort to hand the chalice to Duncan before taking in his hands his head which seemed to be bursting. He felt like he could sense the darkspawn blood spreading and burning everything in his path. His whole body seemed to want to reject the monstrosity that inexorably insinuated itself into him. The pain was so strong that he lost consciousness and collapsed.

His unconsciousness was full of terrible nightmares : all kinds of darkspawns slaughtering beasts and men, capturing women howling their despair, tearing children out of their mothers' arms, and leaving behind a perverted and barren land.

He awoke in a spartan room which included two other empty beds. He sat in a startle and touched his body with disbelief. Looking up, he saw Duncan at his bedside.  
  
"I’m… alive ? Huh, I guess that good news...  
  
\- Yes, Alistair, you are alive and well, and a true Grey Warden now. This is your room that you will share with Legnar and Hadder.(1)"

Alistair looked at the room and then looked at his hands from every angle, as if he expected them to change of appearance. He remembered the sensation of devouring corruption that had invaded him. But now he did not feel so much more… monstrous.

"It was… I…. Well, I didn’t expected that!"

Duncan had a smirk : "Believe me, none of us expected this."  
  
"So I am … special now? Am I supposed to be more... "darkspawnish"? What exactly changes after the union?

"You'll see," replied the commander, with a disillusioned smile. "Oh, I forgot. Take this pendant, it contains a remnant of blood, in memory of those who did not survive."

In remerbrance of the agony of the avvar warrior, Alistair’s heart tightened. "Colban... may the Maker guide you and may your god welcome you as a hero." The collected silence that followed was broken by a Grey Warden knocking at the door who brought a plate full of steaming stew.Duncan took it and placed it on the only table of the room.

"Here, when Hadder came to fetch me to tell me that you seemed to be regaining consciousness, I had a meal prepared for you. You’re gonna need it."  
  
The smell from the plate raised Alistair's senses and his belly made a groaning acquiescence.

It relaxed the atmosphere. Duncan had a smile and Alistair drove away his dark thoughts. He suddenly felt filled with pride blended with joy. He had survived. He had jumped off the cliff and landed on his feet unharmed. He was now, and forever, a full-fledged Grey Warden.

"Duncan. I… Thank you. It might sound strange but… Right now, I feel like I’m in the right place.  
  
"I think so too, Alistair," replied the veteran. And for a second, almost imperceptibly, his face showed a hint of relief.  
  
A few days later, the young man proudly wore a grey and blue livery, covered with a breastplate adorned with a griffin with outstretched wings.

(1) : see chapter 8 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/26697481

**Author's Note:**

> **INSPIRATIONS**
> 
> It started when I watched this [video of Caitie](https://www.blogger.com/u/1/#) about the dalish Vallaslins. It was very interesting but I realized that the vallaslins I had choosen for my warden & inquisitor looked great but... didn't make any sens. So I had to change them. As I had first choosen the Andruil's one for my inquisitor, I needed to chose another one for my warden (I can't help myself to desperatly stick to the "female dalish rogue" type no matter how hard I tried not to do it, so I wanted to make them look as different as possible). Because just so you know I'm a sucker for character's creation : it can take me a looooong time to create a character and every bloody part of it - from the haircut to the colour of the eyes - has to be meaningfull for me. It a kind of weird sickness I can't get rid of....
> 
> As my warden is a ranger, I chose the Ghilan'nain's vallaslin. And I invented a story about it. After doing the "[By the Grace of the dalish](https://www.blogger.com/u/1/#)" quest in DAI, I knew what kind of halla would be involved. I just changed the color of the fur because I liked immaculate white better that yellowish.  
>  Oh and obviously, the way the wolves are attacking one by one is purely fiction. Wolves are actually way more organised and smarter than most of video games ennemies when they hunt...
> 
> Alistair's Joining is... Well.. alistair's [Joining](https://www.blogger.com/u/1/#) right ? 
> 
> "For this moment forth Alistair, you are a grey warden.". I got chills everytime I read it...
> 
> I took inspiration from the _World of Thedas vol.2_ for some of the details that concern his recuitement into the Wardens.
> 
> Alistair mentions in DAO that only one recruit died during his joining, so I guess it was only the two of them. I made this other recruit an avvar barbarian because I wish we could see more of the barbarian people in DA stories. I was, for example, very found of Kell's character from the novel _The Calling_. I might have played more human protagonists if they were barbarians and not nobles. So I made one. I enjoyed it a lot and I hope I'll have other occasions to do it again. 
> 
> I also added two other Grey wardens named Legnar and Hadder. Maybe to put faces and names on those anonymous heros who died tragically at Ostagar....


End file.
